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| | | | How should religions react to the growth of online adultery?
What should our stance be?
Do we accept it as part of evolving technology?
Adultery is a legal and religious issue, can it be justified?
I was interested to read an article:
"When asked about online adultery, a priest answered that, "adultery is adultery, even if it is virtual." Glenn Stanton, author of Why Marriage Matters, agrees saying "It's the matter of the heart and the matter of the soul that really does matter. It's about not being faithful to your partner in giving your heart, your feelings, your emotions to somebody else. Whether or not that's done physically is, in some ways, of small consequence." Indeed, this seems to be a popular view expressed by many."
Source
I'm interested on hearing peoples opinions on this and the affect this has on religions rules of marriage.
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| | | | Adultery is a physical act. Kind of hard to do that on line. So, it is more masterbation that is the act with that. But what happens online is just as devistating as what happens in life. Close or far, dishonesty destroys, I think it has at one point or another to many of us. At the end of the day honesty is what matters. If you are married or in a commited relationship, fooling around, even online is a lie and a lie against all those you love. There is no question about that. A truely loyal person cannot and would not do it.
Me, I know I do not. I am with someone and will not cheat. Yeah, modern bull shit about open relationships is out there. That is simply a way of being dishonest together. Eventually you learn you cannot trust each other.
Leagally, online adultry is nothing. In life, adultry is adultry and is a cheaters way to loosing all they have with real people.You cannot continually behave in a manner inconsistant with how we see ourselves.
"To know, is to know you know nothing."
-Confucius |
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| | | | initially adultery had to do with heirs and property succession, hence why it's only adultery if it's a married woman involved (old testament version).
however, that's not so much an issue now... just like selling children into slavery when they displease you.
the way I see it, adultery is as mental as it is physical. I doubt I'd divource my wife for cybering, but I'd be severely, severely pissed if I found out... Mainly because that means she's not communicating her needs well enough to me and thus looking elsewhere. Relationships are a slippery slope, 95% of the time, and it's better to not start on the road to ruin than selfishly look for a quick fix and ignore the root problems.-J
-J |
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| | | | There is more to the 10 commandents that pertains to this than just the 7th Commandment, Thou shalt not commit adultry.
There is also the 10th commandment which states Thou shalt not covet thy neighbour's house, thou shalt not covet thy neighbour's wife, nor his manservant, nor his maidservant, nor his ox, nor his ass, nor any thing that is thy neighbour's.
The definition of covet is -
American Heritage Dictionary - Cite This Source cov·et (kuv'it) Pronunciation Key
v. cov·et·ed, cov·et·ing, cov·ets
v. tr.
To feel blameworthy desire for (that which is another's).
To wish for longingly.
v. intr.
To feel immoderate desire for that which is another's
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–verb (used without object) 3. to have an inordinate or wrongful desire.
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There's the facts according to the Bible. Tell me how a group of people can change the meaning of this Commandent, and truth as a whole?
Even if you don't believe the Bible as a religion, you have to admit it's a great guide to honest living and one of the best self help books on the market.
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| | | | Can you imagine how dull all the NHB rooms would be if all the married people stopped fooling around? *chuckles* Empty rooms would abound.You cannot continually behave in a manner inconsistant with how we see ourselves.
"To know, is to know you know nothing."
-Confucius |
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| | | | Midnight *LOL* That is my signature my dear. It is how I think towards myself, not others. I like to hope I behave in a manner consistant with who I am.. I would think others would hope they do also.You cannot continually behave in a manner inconsistant with how we see ourselves.
"To know, is to know you know nothing."
-Confucius |
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| | | | not addressing those who've already given their opinion...
this is just my thoughts on Kate's opener:
How should religions react to the growth of online adultery? I question the notion that any religion should take a 'stance' on any topic. I guess it's because I don't see them as the 'enforcers' of right or wrong...but a safe place to 'BE' in this complicated world. I'll leave the judging of my soul to a higher-spirit.
What should our stance be? I'll try and be the best ME I can be and my stance on what is right or wrong works for me and my life. In other words, I try to not judge what others do. I may not 'associate' with others who do not think like myself..so in a way I am judging...or choosing...???? ~I can confuse myself in my own mental arguments ...heh
Do we accept it as part of evolving technology? This is like asking if we accept all change that happens with the changing times, isn't it? Again, acceptance..or not...is for the individual to decide if it's right or wrong.
Adultery is a legal and religious issue, can it be justified? I understand that many think that marriage is a 'legal' institution...Yet, before the government there was still marriage. It's become a legal issue when the government decided to keep track of people.
Personally I believe I can be married without having some legal paper to show...marriage is as much mental as physical. I have a legal document saying I'm married to MrMoneyMaker for financial/insurance reasons ONLY. I also feel I can be married to more than one person. Of course this is only allowed to happen "mentally or online" by the legal forces that be.
If there is a problem with my stance, then I'll discuss that when the time comes when I transistion on...
The older I get, the more I understand and the farther from organized religion I get. At the same time, the farther from organized religion I get, the happier and more content in my personal views I am.
thanks. |
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| | | | Personally, I've been raised in a denomination that sees the thought of lust toward another as adultry. My view is much less orthodox. Of course not being married at this point, perhaps I don't have a true stance these days.
You can look at just about any religious 'book', be it the bible, the koran, Torah, Rabinic literature, and each has a different view on just what adultery is.
Ultimately it doesn't matter who choses to go by which religous text in my book, because I have come to the realization, in my own mind, that I have to hold fast to my own beliefs and convicitions *s*
Kate your comments beg the question..what defines 'cheating' online ? |
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| | | | freesia - I think cheating is anything that you feel you should "hide" from your spouse. If it feels like you are betraying them, you probably are. To profess love to one and then to another online is my distinction, I guess though.
I was interested that a priest should accept that "virtual adultery" is still the same. Then of course Jane backed up his statement with the commandment of "Do not covet..."
I think I was saddened to read that almost 30% of current divorce cases have cited the internet as the cause of the break down of marriage. |
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