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| | | | Control was a comfort,
A security blanket that kept the wolves at bay.
It kept me from feeling too much,
From letting Oothers knowing all that is me.
It used to be a good plan,
It has kept me sane through trials,
Events that should have left me weeping and broken,
Instead i was able to keep going because i was in control.
Being in control of my emotions,
Being in control of thoughts and actions,
Being in control of my life,
It's all been very important to me.
But i've hit a brick wall,
And upon my recovery i saw things about myself,
Things that i didn't like,
Things that i wanted to change.
Having already faced myself,
Facing the faults within,
And upon the completion of so many changes,
my eyes are finally open to what must be done.
i must let go.
Give control over my heart,
Give control of my will,
Give control of my life.
Be it to the goddess,
Or the Fates that plot and scheme,
Be it to a lover that presents Himself so deliciiously,
i must let go.
And so i will,
Letting myself feel freely,
Give freely,
Express freely..
i always thought my freedom was granted by taking the bull by the horns,
By being in control of how, where, when and why,
But it wasn't until i gave up the control,
That i finally found my freedom.
With each passing day, I didn't lose hope. I fought to have more.
---Amy Tan, One Hundred Secret Senses |
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| | | | enjoying the read
thanks for sharing
maybe i'll post again
~~showing my better side~~ |
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